Wednesday, November 30, 2005

No More


Yesterday night would be history, i would certainly remember that night, albeit for many reasons. Photos we took would definitely remind us of the great friends we have had, and would certainly bring back fond memories in the future. Altough there was fun, there was dissapointment as well.

Firstly, can we form an equation that states, have faith= trust? (take a moment to think whether it works, it will help you to undersatnd this rather abstract post better)

Yeah, i think this is certainly workable, as if you have faith in the person, you would trust the person. But in reality, one says that he trust the person, but doesn't really have faith in him. So it totally disproves the theory isn't it? This is reality, but we have already agreed upon the fact that have faith= trust isn't it ? but what is the fucking problem(sorry for the vulgarity, i've stopped using it anyways) then? hahah, after some consideration, my brilliant brain has given me the answer. This scenario can't happen as i seriously think that the equation doesn't work another way. You can't possibly have faith in the person and do not trust the person, simply YOU ARE LYING. I've been deprived of my life when i was in catholic high, although i myself committed myself to it, but now what? I am still fucked up isn't it? Just because i never gone against you you think that i can't? what the fuck, you know me good enough. The problem doesn't lies in the fact that you don't trust me or what, just fucking don't give some damned reasons that you know won't decieve my brain. I promise, this is the last time i'm going to compromise...

"To be trusted is a greater compliment than being loved"
George Macdonald

Monday, November 28, 2005

Catholic High

Time flies... tomorrow will be the graduation for the secondary 4's from catholic high school. It's been long awaited by many people. Many who used to be normal students( poser=QINGWEN=not normal) have visited orchard or various shopping malls to update their wardrobe. Most of us would be thinking of ways to exploit that night, i mean yeah, exploit. But what about after that night? Would you walk differently? Would you talk in a different manner? Would you forget your friends?Would you be a different person?Would you forget your juniors? Would you forget your teachers?

As a matter of fact, i think there wouldn't be a change, at least for those who don't want to change. Certainly there are regrets in this school, at least for myself, but it had brought us fun and joy. Many of us(i mean 4/8, as i know of) have committed ourselves to the future programmes of catholic high, i've wondered whether this 'deal' as i would call it, comes out sincerely from our hearts or do we think it is a chore to fulfill? I mean for those who have benefitted, more or less its our of appreciation and worst to worst treat it as a return of favour, however, for certain people, i mean a SMALL group, why have hey made the choice?

I'm not questioning about why people are doing this by the way. This actually leads us to what i want to say. Would there be peole backing out? Are our hearts truly with GONG JIAO?

we never know.

Maybe i will be the one backing out. One never knows.

hahah, why am i writing such things??? haha, maybe 7hrs of DOTA spoiled my brain...

"Unless you can find some sort of loyalty, you cannot find unity and peace in your active living"
Samuel Butler

Friday, November 25, 2005

Another day

Whew, another week passed, befroe long, i think i wil be back in school again. First thing first, all the blogskins for darryl and kuty looks decent( mines the best) muah hahah... Harry potter was a bit of a dissapointment for me, it wasn't as fantastic as what the critics said, i think it was only worth at most a 3 star, the 3 stars was for the part where hermione jumped out to hug harry(opPs). It was really a very special scene. However, the scene where hermione was crying because of the insensitive harry potter and ron, was VERY redundant... wasted 10 secs...wth, how has it got a link to what was happening then, might as well remove this scene, and added more quiddITCH animations apart from the pathetic VICTOR KRUM scene...

yeAh, JJ bought a dirty-green coloured jacket, it looks rather cool, i think it will definitely look nice on JJ as he is very, and i seriously mean VERY muscular. Lan today was a bit sian, no doubt, perhaps it was because we got owned??? I really don't know, beginning to lose interest in DOTA le...haha, anyway, it is makes me another day closer to VJC.

In fact, i'm afraid that i would not be able to get to Vj, it would be horrendous for me, if i didn't make it after the release of 'O' level results, i started asking myself how much i have prepared.
Not much actually, frankly speaking. I would definitely not regret over what i have done, because i had a enjoyed myself then. But what if i didn't make it to VJC...

The day to sentosa wa quite fun haha, we are really dumb to go out on the rainy day, but who cares? We've enjoyed ourselves and certainly had some fun, we'll take a look at the pictures in next few post i suppose.. Shaun Ho was really stylistic in his spike, pointing into the sky( the picture illustrates it), the picture looks a bit off la, he looks more like a monster poser instead of his usual cool self, haha, who cares? He just look zai with the pose. (shuan pls pardon me for this) Anyway, YS used his socks to wipe off the sand that went on his face, eWWWwwwwWW... not his usual self. ( YS i used his ok?)

Oh, btw, anyone who read my previous post please don't guess that you are the person or what. I believe you have already taken action to remedy the situation cos you are NOT dumb. Anyway, i will not change my point of view of a person over an incident or whatsoever, my friends are still my friends, please take whatever i mention in my blog lightly as i would definitely talk about extremely sensitive or serious issues, ok???

I just feel like adding this picture, he look really cool doesn't he? I'm not a GAY(thx). I just want to have a picture in this whole lump of words and letters!

Good luck my friends in whatever you do!

no quotes this time.

Thursday, November 24, 2005


wOw, a long time since writing or rather typing anything agian. Now, full of inspiration, i would have some stories to tell.

Its once again about friends and myself.

A friend of mine is always very chatty, he i mean actually 2 parties are involved in this POST, in fact both of them are very chatty. Both are nice personnels who would render aid to any one who needs it, albeit sometimes delayed aid. There was a long histiry to this misconception. It was due to the nature o ftheir personality that this misconception ever occured. The problem infact escalated to the extent where one party would not like to see the other. But why wasn't it resolved when both parties are reasonable and decent people?
In fact, it was due to this misconception, which i would now like to talk about. One of the parties felt that he was on decent or even good terms with the other. This was in fact an assumption of unreality. The ultimate truth was that one party greatly disliked the other, due to some comments made between them. What's the problem here? One party has to wake up and tell the other party that YOU SUCK, or the other party must realise that HE SUCK and proceed with apologies... Only when one party accepts the blame then they can coexist again...

AND dye hair guy, please even the colour next time.. =D

Saturday, November 19, 2005

Yu Hu

The exams are finally over. Its time for 4/8 to get together. I really have nothing to tell you all la, seriously. ALL that i can say is that JC teo is damn 'hiong' but i will try to tell you all(NZW) if you really really wish to know.

4/8 gogogo!!!

"Courage means to keep working a relationship, to continue seeking solutions to difficult problems, and to stay focused during stressful periods."
Dennis Wailey

Tuesday, November 15, 2005

Showing Gratitude

I was wondering about what to post on my way back home, but i was sure about this title(showing gratitude) after this day 15th NOVEMBER 2005 where i had my first AMATH paper.

My fellow classmates, would know my standard in this subject( sounds as if its my best). In fact, i have never had a PASS in this subject since the 2nd term in my Secondary 3 year, right till my prelims, i was still failing...badly...

In contrast, today when i took the paper, the feeling was completely different. Usually, my mine would be messed up with different wrong methods to attempting the question. However, today i know i knew the way to do it. Even when i encountered a question which i'm not sure of how to do, i calmly proceeded to the next question, feeling the composure. I hope the results for this subject would be positive when i'm recieving it next MARCH.

But how have I made this improvement? Obviously someone gave me aid. Initially, it was my tuition teacher, however after he opted for a change in his occupation, he became very busy and had less time to look and scrutinise at my work, therefore he didn't know that i was not doing the work he assigned and this was the reason why i had not made any improvement in the past year. Nevertheless, one would still have their teacher, however my teacher placed her trust in me to do my own studying, as she had faith in my aptitude, i failed her. I did not have the discipline to do my ten years series, my ten years series would certainly fetch a good price in the 2nd hand brash basah complex, it still looks DAMN new. Here came my saviour 2 weeks before the 'O' levels. He is a friend of mine who is extremely proficient in the subject of mathematics, he rendered aid to me unconditionally... OBVIOUSLY I've GROWN under his help, as i felt that the paper was now rather managable.

Now, although I said it was unconditional, i felt quite bad as he spent lots of his time with me, going through things which he was more than familiar with. We spent many days and nights together( uh, not physically) ploughing through questions and concepts. I had many of my doubts cleared, and finally had the chance practising. I really do not know how I should show appreciation for his efforts... It would definitely be something 'special' ( not what my friend got(kiss) as i mentioned in the post TAKING INITIATIVE though). But i wouldn't mind if he requested( haha), i'm not a gay, but i'm really serious in expressing my thanks to him as he really help me lotsss. Maybe, I would have better ideas soon, please wait my friend.

Actually, why are people so keen or for most people keen in showing gratitude towards others? Is it the nature of huamn beings or it just happens to some individuals? I really have no idea man. But seriously, you will feel much better saying a word of thanks to your teacher, parents, friends, for whatever they have given you. I'm not talking in the aspect of KARMA or what, but both parties would definitely feel better, as probably you show that you appreciated his/her efforts.

"Happiness cannot be traveled to, owned, earned, worn or consumed. Happiness is the spiritual experience of living every minute with love, grace, and gratitude."
Denis Waitley

Saturday, November 12, 2005

Really for friends?

Now, i suppose everyone's blog will be something like 4days left!!!(for those taking O lvl's) but lots of things happened during this period of time, amidst the busy and troubling O lvl's.

As mentioned in the previous post, my friend told me about his unexpected rewards for taking initiative. But instead of keeping the scret for him, i leaked it. (You may think that i'm a bloody loser by now, but i shall explain myself) When people do something, I mean there must be and would be a reason behind it, be it good or bad. Obviously, by leaking the 'secret' it would be for a good purpose; if i leaked it for a bad purpose, then i do not deserve to be my freind's friend, isn't it?

Frankly speaking, in my opinion, the people that my friend is 'messing' with are probably devil-may-care type of person, and he was on top of the heaven. This is why i leaked the information, and i shall not explain more if one can't comprehend.

However, after what i've seen were the effects of my acts, i felt really sorry for my friend who took me as his fast friend. I kind of like betrayed his trust or something like that. Ok, it's not something like that, i betrayed his trust. I think this may sound very 'womanish' (i'm not a male chauvinist by the way) but i'm really sorry, as this incident became more pronounced, another classmate of mines felt in a way unhappy(pardon me if i'm wrong). He began to have small quarrels with my friend. This wasn't what i wanted.

Maybe it was my fault that i tried to help, i mean who am I to interfere in someone else's life? Although another friend of mine who is otherwise known as the 'toucher' felt the same, i believe and seriously think that i shouldn't have acted.

In fact, this brings us to a point of what people always said. 'mine your own bussiness'
should we keep our feelings or thought's to ourselves, or should we try to interfere with some other person's life? Can we draw a line to decide whether we are helping others or simply being a busybody?

Anyway, let's work hard for the remainig days for the 'O' level's.

"What is Friendship when complete?
'Tis to share all joy and grief;
'Tis to lend all due relief
From the tongue, the heart, the hand;
'Tis to mortgage house and land;
For a friend be sold a slave;
'Tis to die upon a grave,If a friend therein do lie."

Anne Finch

Saturday, November 05, 2005

Taking Initiative

Taking Initiative

Today, i was on a bus, travelling to my grandmother's place. It so happen that the bus was suffocatingly crowded. i thought it was because of the muslim festival, but i realised it was yesterday but not today.

Come on, by now you may be asking what has it got to do with Taking Initiative? Now, this was what i saw. Since the bus was crowded, many people was standing, then and there i saw a young chap, perhaps around my age looking slightly uncomfortable. Why is it so? I came to realise later. He was in fact pondering whether to give up his seat to an old lady; he gave up his seat after 2 stops but by then, the old lady almost reached her destination. What a pity.

This in fact is closely related to A thing that me and my friend have been talking about. We dicussed the fact that people, i mean boys and girls or man and women often missed their chances because they do not dare to make the first move. There seem to be this layer, blocking or preventing the 2 people to come together to become friends. We sought for a solution, which is to come up with this method to break down this imaginary barrier. However, there seem to be no plausible solution to this problem, except for taking the initiative to say probably HI. But this is provided that the other party don't shun you off ba...

Hey hey, there was another friend, who discussed this another incident with me, it was a matter which concerns us both, or in better words related to us both as we were once from this organisation in school. We had this junior by the name of Edward, which we talked about, actually it was the organisation as a whole. This junior seem to take us or rather him, as i'm not concerned with such matters, to be TRANSPARENT to quote him. He was rather offended by this PHENOMENON, which i think is far too common nowadays. He thinks that at least he should say 'hi' or something like that, which i do not think is asking to much from THEM. Where does the problem lies in??? I questioned the ties that bind, because this surely does not apply to us, as we would say 'harlo', to even some seniors whom we are not close with. He agreed. But the bottom line is that, whether we have imparted ot taught them anything, you should say at least a 'hi'. You do that even to an aquaintance don't you??? He was really disgusted by this type of behaviour. And i think that this incident is really worth everyone considering, taking in the fact that they are the leaders of the student body...

Now, in fact we should take initiative in many things, such as love and friendship. This things which are imaterial, literally, takes effort to build, and would weaken or lost if consistent effort is not put in.
4805 , hope that this does not happen.

Time for gossips. I have another friend, which is rather successful in achiving his aims, by taking initiative. I had rather long conversations with him that day on messenger, which he seems to be exorbitantly happy. He had a 1V3 experience. He is not the legend in TP Library, for 4805s' information. He did this single-handedly, and he is thrilled by the experience. I hope he would not blame me for saying this. He took the initiative to ask to study with them, which he then took another initiative by saying that 1 of the girls was cute, and he got a surprise, which i shall leave you all to think about...haha

Don't waste anymore time, do it now.

"You've got to take the initiative and play your game. In a decisive set, confidence is the difference."(American professional Tennis Player. b.1954 Fort Lauderdale, Florida, USA)

Friday, November 04, 2005

TAGBOARD(pls read)

Hi, new posts will be up soon, if you want to know about my fratenity.

Sorry, because i'm searching for inspiration and time.


Hi, it has been a long time since i have made comments on the internet, because its dangerous you know??? This is the first post and basically, it would be a disclaimer. Sigh...

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